We all think we know best about dating related issues, right? It’s Ok to admit that. We’re grown-ups, so we have lots of life experience and we definitely know the drill regarding potential partners. You can’t pull the wool over our eyes, now can you? We know what works and what doesn’t, right? Well, maybe. When is it time to challenge some of those limiting beliefs that we’ve been carrying for years, maybe even for a lifetime, and ask ourselves a powerful question: How possible is it that what I believe to be “MY” truth may not be “THE” actual truth?
So, what are some of your dating related limiting beliefs? There are no good men out there? (Out where? In the state, in the country, in the entire world?) All women are gold diggers? Men don’t want to commit? All women want to control you? The negative list goes on..
How well are those beliefs serving you? When is it time to challenge those limiting beliefs? If you are ready to begin the challenge, how did those beliefs develop? When did those beliefs begin? During childhood, teenagehood, on the rebound after a disappointing relationship? Who’s voice do you hear in those beliefs? Parents, peers, media? What about your voice?
When you begin to challenge those beliefs, you may be surprised about how your behavior changes toward potential partners. Many of my coaching clients find that they become more open to possibilities, more relaxed, more curious, more positive, in a nutshell: more appealing.
So, think about shedding those extra pounds of limiting beliefs that are bogging you down. You just may start noticing the potential in those around you that you may have been rejecting before exploring. They may in turn start noticing how incredibly special you are. If your belief system has not been bringing you the love that you seek, try challenging it with questions, if it doesn’t hold up, it’s not likely “THE” actual truth now, is it?
By Heidi Krantz, OTR, CPC